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ice queen

Rambling about diamonds & Stargate: Atlantis.

 Does contain spoilers for "Quarantine", so beware.

The reaction to the ring Rodney bought for Katie ("conflict-free diamond, an eighth of a carat") has made me think some more about my feelings about engagement rings. It also made me aware of my lack of knowledge about such things, and about conflict-free diamonds ... so I did some research.

The general fangirl reaction has been to call Rodney a cheapskate for "only" buying an eighth of a carat. This is what initially got my hackles up. I admit - I have a problem with engagement rings. For a lot of girls, it seems, engagement rings are a measure of not only how much your guy loves you, but also whether or not he's worth marrying. The bigger the diamond, the more you are loved and the bigger the catch your guy is. Me? I can't stand engagement rings. I would never accept one, even though it is possible that I would accept the proposal. To me, engagement rings are symbolic of the old-fashioned view of women as property. The man buys his woman's hand in marriage, securing himself someone who will cook and clean for him. That's the old view. Man provides the $$, woman earns her keep by housekeeping. The engagement ring, to me, is the start of that road. Otherwise, why is there no engagement gift from the woman to the man? Anyway, that's how I feel about it. 

Another aspect to this is the erroneous designation of Rodney as a cheapskate. Having looked around online, I found prices for ordinary diamonds ranged from $720 for a titanium ring with one tenth of a carat, to a standard silver ring with half a carat costing $1,200.00. A ring with a diamond of an eighth of a carat would obviously then be priced between $720 and $1200. Not spare change. On top of that, conflict-free diamonds cost between 3% and 10% more than conflict diamonds. I was pleased, though, to discover there is actually a booming business in conflict-free diamonds. Conflict-free diamonds, for those who don't know, are diamonds created where the money made from them does not support war, and also where the workers who mine them do so under fair labour conditions. (You can read some about it here.) I think it's cool, too, that the writers of SG:A wrote that Rodney chose to buy a conflict-free diamond. Yay for ethical purchasing practices!

Final word, though? I thought they handled the break-up of Rodney and Katie really well. They showed us and the characters that they just weren't suited to a life together. It's sad, though, that Rodney thinks it's his fault - Katie was right, Rodney is too hard on himself. (I blame Jeannie and her constant criticism!)

Wow, I went on a bit there.


Heh. I'm glad they broke up; not because there was anything wrong with Katie, because there wasn't, only - she wasn't my sort of person. If I lived in Atlantis she wouldn't be the sort of person I'd hang out with, simply because I just don't think we have anything in common. Rodney, on the other hand, would be. It'd be one of those "oh dear, my brilliant funny whacky friend Rodney has this girlfriend who is really sweet but just so - i dunno - and also, just not exactly right for him, you know?" - and I'd have to make conversation somehow when we all got together and I'd wish he'd picked someone else I really got on with who *was* right for him.

Re engagement rings: I'm kinda old fashioned, and Guy knows it. For this reason he drove to PE to ask my parents permission; not because they own me or anything, but because he knew it would touch the heart of my 70-yr-old and very old-fashioned father, and make him realise that even though these things are a bit silly and outdated, they'd be done because they mattered to him, and because of that, mattered to me. So, similarly (i.e. beacuse i am strangely old-fashioned), Guy proposed with a ring. What was cool though was that it was plain and simple and tiny, and as he gave it to me he explained that he'd just wanted something to give me. He then explained that his plan was that we melt the ring down, so there would be a tangible something I always had that had been with me at a time we made such an important decision, and design, together, something simple and pretty (with a diamon or not depending on what we thought was best when we designed it) that was a Something We Made Together, like the life we were planning. It was quite cool I thought. [/end ramble]
Yeah, I totally get what you're saying about Katie - I think we've probably all experienced that with friends: having to be nice to partners you just have nothing in common with.

You know, I love that Guy respected your dad enough to ask permission, and also his reasoning behind the ring. That kind of thing I can totally get behind - tradition which is followed because of thought-out reasons. I have met many women, unfortunately, who just want a huge ring because of greed, or to gain status amongst others. That's the kind of thing I despise. I'm also not overly fond of tradition for tradition's sake - I like thinking to actually be involved. It doesn't surprise me, however, that you guys had such a meaningful engagement.

Ha. My thoughts.

He so bought a Canadian Diamond. ;)

What you say makes sense. Certainly wasn't my style though. I'd personally rather something without a stone at all. I'd say Katie too would be better suited to have a simple style that didn't stick out at all because of her job. Yeah way over thinking this.

Hmmm you mean I'm not the only one who finds Jeannie a tad more mean then funny?